Question: How many reality shows about cakes can America stand? Answer: Seemingly unlimited.
The website current.tv counts six. I will admit when I don't feel like thinking and really just want to hear some ambient sound and stare into the middle distance cake shows are there for me. It's no secret that I love cake. Chocolate, vanilla, yellow, funfetti, red velvet, that shit is all good. If you, however bring coconut near me you will wearing that abomination unto the lord. Jesus hates coconut anything. It's in the bible. Leviticus I believe. What the glut of cake shows is symbolic of though is the endless non-creativity of mass media, especially reality based shows. If one show has a modicum of success then it is copied ad nauseum. No one wants to think and be original anymore. Same with movies and music. I don't know the exact numbers but it seems like every other movie that comes out is either a prequel, a sequel, a remake, or a squeekuel (fucking Chipmunks).
When it comes to music the quickest way to get on the radio is to make a shitty cover of a great song. Case in point:
Don't let America's fucked up sense of patriotism sway you. I fully support our troops. They are willing to sacrifice something I and many others simply would not. I do not, however, support this song. Look the band up on the interwebz. They get worse. Much worse.
Ok, rant over. 3-2-1, 1-2-3 what the heck is bothering me? Big breaths. Urge to kill...fading.
Here's what I trained Saturday.
Snatch Complex: 3x3
Walking Lunge: 3x20 yards
w/
DB Shoulder Press: 3x15
45' Back Extension: 3x10
w/
Neutral Grip Chins: 3x5
Face Pulls: 3x15
w/
Reverse Grip DB Curls: 3x10
w/
Side Crunches on 45' Bk. Ext: 3x10 each side
That kind of looks like I just threw a bunch of shit together when I got to the gym. There was however a method to the madness. Here's a breakdown of why I did each exercise.
Snatch Complex: Work on force production; work my mobility through overhead squat portion
Walking Lunge: Glute/hamstring insertion point is weak; mobility work through single leg variations
Shoulder Press: not training barbell overhead press; want cannonball shoulders
45' Back Extension: Lower back erectors weak/tight; hams and glutes can always use some good work
Neutral Grip Chins: neutral grip gives you greatest biomechanical advantage; lats and upper back need strength
Face Pulls: work external rotators of shoulder to prevent kyphosis, impingements, and other shoulder problems
Reverse Grip Curls: Grip/forearms
Side Bends: Obliques important for core stability when squatting and deadlifting
So there you have it. So many emotions involved in this post. You should have seen me typing it. Crying, laughing, yelling, cowering, indifference, I'm pooped. Before you go I need your help. I want to start writing more informative posts. Articles if you will. What I want from you folks is to give me ideas on what to write about. What is something you want to know? Want my opinion on certain subjects in the strength and fitness industry? Want to learn about some awesome guys and gals from days gone by? Want some motivation? Ask away. You can either leave a question or topic in the comments or email me at tdequaine@hotmail.com. If you guys don't ask anything then it's all going to come from my head. I got a lot going on up there. Be ready.
Song of the Day:
“It is better to fail in originality than to succeed in imitation.”
-Herman Melville
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Friday, August 27, 2010
Update, Jr.
Part of this post is to through some new shit against the wall and see what sticks in your brains and part is some stuff I forgot to post about yesterday.
This week I've been working a lot on my mobility. Lots of stretching and rolling. What's strange about a complex muscle system like the hip girdle is that when one part is off, the rest is off. Case in point: my right TFL (tensor fascia latae). This sonuvabitch has been bothering me for a while and I've recently started to really pay attention to it with the roller and the stretching. Because of this it's started to relax and not be so damn tight. Because of that other parts of my hip complex have started to overcompensate and thusly feel tight. My left iliopsoas and piriformis are starting to feel tight and have led to some back pain of late. It's like playing that Wack-a-Mole game at Chuck E. Cheese's (the "E" stands for Entertainment). You hit one down and another one pops up in a different place until you get so goddamn mad and frustrated you start missing, yanking the mallet off of the game, kicking the game, being asked to leave, refusing to leave, having the cops called, still refusing to leave, being "escorted" out in a struggle where your pants and underwear end up around your ankles, and so on and so forth. I've seen it a hundred times. My point is that when you're dealing with a biomechanical issue in the human body you have to treat the whole system, not just the symptoms. That's kind of a catchy rhyme. I should trademark that.
The other thing that I've been working on is my diet plan for my upcoming meet cycle. It's going to be macronutrient (carbs, fat, protein) based instead of calorie counting based. I recover better with more protein so that is going to stay constant at 250 grams per day. Carbohydrate intake is going to be based on my activity level. On days I lift heavy and use a lot of muscle mass I'll eat more. Probably in the 400-600 gram range. On days that I rest or do just cardio it'll be closer to 100-200 grams. I'm going to try to get most of that from fruits and sweet potatoes with some rice, oats, and bread sprinkled in. Fats is going to be based on my carbohydrate intake. Higher carb days will be lower fat days and vice versa. Fat sources will be egg yolks, some nuts and seeds, natural nut butters, and oils such as coconut and olive. I'm not going to put together a detailed, what-to-eat-when plan like I normally do. I know what I should and shouldn't eat and I know how much to eat. I just have to be diligent with it as it is very easy for me to get lazy with it.
So there you have it. I'm ready to get going with my meet cycle. I'm excited to see what I can do.
Song of the Day:
“There is no short cut to achievement. Life requires thorough preparation -- veneer isn't worth anything.”
-George Washington Carver
This week I've been working a lot on my mobility. Lots of stretching and rolling. What's strange about a complex muscle system like the hip girdle is that when one part is off, the rest is off. Case in point: my right TFL (tensor fascia latae). This sonuvabitch has been bothering me for a while and I've recently started to really pay attention to it with the roller and the stretching. Because of this it's started to relax and not be so damn tight. Because of that other parts of my hip complex have started to overcompensate and thusly feel tight. My left iliopsoas and piriformis are starting to feel tight and have led to some back pain of late. It's like playing that Wack-a-Mole game at Chuck E. Cheese's (the "E" stands for Entertainment). You hit one down and another one pops up in a different place until you get so goddamn mad and frustrated you start missing, yanking the mallet off of the game, kicking the game, being asked to leave, refusing to leave, having the cops called, still refusing to leave, being "escorted" out in a struggle where your pants and underwear end up around your ankles, and so on and so forth. I've seen it a hundred times. My point is that when you're dealing with a biomechanical issue in the human body you have to treat the whole system, not just the symptoms. That's kind of a catchy rhyme. I should trademark that.
The other thing that I've been working on is my diet plan for my upcoming meet cycle. It's going to be macronutrient (carbs, fat, protein) based instead of calorie counting based. I recover better with more protein so that is going to stay constant at 250 grams per day. Carbohydrate intake is going to be based on my activity level. On days I lift heavy and use a lot of muscle mass I'll eat more. Probably in the 400-600 gram range. On days that I rest or do just cardio it'll be closer to 100-200 grams. I'm going to try to get most of that from fruits and sweet potatoes with some rice, oats, and bread sprinkled in. Fats is going to be based on my carbohydrate intake. Higher carb days will be lower fat days and vice versa. Fat sources will be egg yolks, some nuts and seeds, natural nut butters, and oils such as coconut and olive. I'm not going to put together a detailed, what-to-eat-when plan like I normally do. I know what I should and shouldn't eat and I know how much to eat. I just have to be diligent with it as it is very easy for me to get lazy with it.
So there you have it. I'm ready to get going with my meet cycle. I'm excited to see what I can do.
Song of the Day:
“There is no short cut to achievement. Life requires thorough preparation -- veneer isn't worth anything.”
-George Washington Carver
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Update
I've been deloading this week so nothing worth writing about. Monday I went for a run with Katie, Tuesday I did a light upper body workout, and today was a light lower body workout. I'm still working on how I want my diet to run for my upcoming meet cycle. I'll post it up when I have it figured out. Until then, go Packers.
Song of the Day: Listen to any/all of the songs on this website.
“Take rest; a field that has rested gives a bountiful crop.” -Ovid
Song of the Day: Listen to any/all of the songs on this website.
“Take rest; a field that has rested gives a bountiful crop.” -Ovid
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Big Al's Is My Bitch
Saturday Lance came up and trained at West Allis Barbell with me. He did a deload deadlift and I did a rep total body. Nothing special. After training we sauntered on down to a local diner called Big Al's Cafe. Big Al's has this special/eating challenge called the Craaaaaaaazy Eight Special. It consists of eight eggs, eight sausage links, eight pieces of bacon, eight pancakes, and eight pieces of toast. I've had my eye on this challenge for a while now. I've even been plotting my plan of attack so I knew exactly what to do when I dug in. I will say that I was legit nervous going in though. The only thing I really had to lose was my pride, but that is worth a lot to me. To see it dashed before my eyes by a shitload of breakfast foods would be just too much for me to take.
Here was my plan of attack: I would power through all the proteins first then eat the starches last. This way the starches wouldn't have time to expand and fill me up. This is a very simplistic approach that would obviously need to be tweaked as things went on. I was to be like Bruce Lee and be fluid. Adjusting to cracks in stone like a rivulet of water.
Eggs were first. They were scrambbies without salt or pepper. I eat six eggs everyday so this was no big deal. Took me maybe 7 minutes tops.
Next was the bacon and sausage. To say I was surprised by the sausages would be an understatement. These were not the Jimmy Dean sausage links that you can pick up at the grocery store. These were a few grams of pork anus shy of being a brat. Probably an inch in diameter and about 4-5 inches long. I decided to eat half of the sausage and half the bacon until they were gone. Four sausages, four bacon, two and two, then two rounds of one each. After this I was ok but starting to feel the full. My taste buds were burned out from the sausage and my palate did not want another drop of grease.
Next came the starches. I went with the one to one approach. I poured a bunch of syrup on my plate and started dipping my first pancake. It went down without any problems. Next came the toast. The middle was soft and buttery but the crust was very chewy. By the end of four of each I was extremely full. Every time I put a bite of pancake in my mouth my body screamed, "Unless you want to see this guys brothers don't swallow." My mouth was dry and my jaw hurt from all the chew, chew, chewing.
This is where my focus and mental toughness came into play. If they had been covered in peanut butter it wouldn't have even been an issue. But alas, there was no peanut butter. Only my wits and focus. I kept making deals with myself. I'd say, "Just get through this pancake and piece of toast and you can quit." Every time I got through it I made myself another deal and another and another. Then it was down to the last pancake. I cut into six pieces. As I put each piece in my mouth I took a small sip of water to help with chewing and swallowing. And then, after what seemed like an eternity, I swallowed the last piece.
Apparently I was the first legit finisher of the challenge. There was another guy that finished but it took him well past the hour time limit. I finished in 58 minutes. The waitresses had never seen such awesomeness and I doubt they ever will again. For finishing the Craaaaaaaazy Eight challenge my food was free, I get two free meals, and my picture will go up on the Big Al's wall of fame.
When I got home all I could do was lay on my back and side in an effort to relieve some pressure. I'm glad I did it, but will never do it again. I also might not be able to eat pancakes and sausages for a while. I just hope they haven't been totally ruined for me.
Not-Quite-Song-of-the-Day:
“So long as you have food in your mouth, you have solved all questions for the time being.” -Franz Kafka
Here was my plan of attack: I would power through all the proteins first then eat the starches last. This way the starches wouldn't have time to expand and fill me up. This is a very simplistic approach that would obviously need to be tweaked as things went on. I was to be like Bruce Lee and be fluid. Adjusting to cracks in stone like a rivulet of water.
Eggs were first. They were scrambbies without salt or pepper. I eat six eggs everyday so this was no big deal. Took me maybe 7 minutes tops.
Next was the bacon and sausage. To say I was surprised by the sausages would be an understatement. These were not the Jimmy Dean sausage links that you can pick up at the grocery store. These were a few grams of pork anus shy of being a brat. Probably an inch in diameter and about 4-5 inches long. I decided to eat half of the sausage and half the bacon until they were gone. Four sausages, four bacon, two and two, then two rounds of one each. After this I was ok but starting to feel the full. My taste buds were burned out from the sausage and my palate did not want another drop of grease.
Next came the starches. I went with the one to one approach. I poured a bunch of syrup on my plate and started dipping my first pancake. It went down without any problems. Next came the toast. The middle was soft and buttery but the crust was very chewy. By the end of four of each I was extremely full. Every time I put a bite of pancake in my mouth my body screamed, "Unless you want to see this guys brothers don't swallow." My mouth was dry and my jaw hurt from all the chew, chew, chewing.
This is where my focus and mental toughness came into play. If they had been covered in peanut butter it wouldn't have even been an issue. But alas, there was no peanut butter. Only my wits and focus. I kept making deals with myself. I'd say, "Just get through this pancake and piece of toast and you can quit." Every time I got through it I made myself another deal and another and another. Then it was down to the last pancake. I cut into six pieces. As I put each piece in my mouth I took a small sip of water to help with chewing and swallowing. And then, after what seemed like an eternity, I swallowed the last piece.
Apparently I was the first legit finisher of the challenge. There was another guy that finished but it took him well past the hour time limit. I finished in 58 minutes. The waitresses had never seen such awesomeness and I doubt they ever will again. For finishing the Craaaaaaaazy Eight challenge my food was free, I get two free meals, and my picture will go up on the Big Al's wall of fame.
When I got home all I could do was lay on my back and side in an effort to relieve some pressure. I'm glad I did it, but will never do it again. I also might not be able to eat pancakes and sausages for a while. I just hope they haven't been totally ruined for me.
Not-Quite-Song-of-the-Day:
“So long as you have food in your mouth, you have solved all questions for the time being.” -Franz Kafka
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Thursday- Squat
Squat: 340x3; 390x3; 435x3
Bulgarian Split Squat: 3x10 each
Glute Ham Hypers: 3x15
w/
Straight Leg Raises: 3x15
Today was a giant pile of shit. 435 felt like the weight of the world. I'm trying to be, but I'm not quite up to Atlas' level. I think this is due to a number of factors. Sleep, eating, diarrhea, I'm tighter than a duck's asshole. You know the usual stuff. I've got my training cycle figured out for my upcoming meet. I'm going to put together a diet plan as well as my eating has been less than stellar. I don't think I'm eating enough and it's affecting my recovery. I'm going to deload next week and hopefully get the tightness worked out. Then its time to cowgirl up and start kicking ass in preparation for my meet.
Song of the Day:
"Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character."
-Albert Einstein
Bulgarian Split Squat: 3x10 each
Glute Ham Hypers: 3x15
w/
Straight Leg Raises: 3x15
Today was a giant pile of shit. 435 felt like the weight of the world. I'm trying to be, but I'm not quite up to Atlas' level. I think this is due to a number of factors. Sleep, eating, diarrhea, I'm tighter than a duck's asshole. You know the usual stuff. I've got my training cycle figured out for my upcoming meet. I'm going to put together a diet plan as well as my eating has been less than stellar. I don't think I'm eating enough and it's affecting my recovery. I'm going to deload next week and hopefully get the tightness worked out. Then its time to cowgirl up and start kicking ass in preparation for my meet.
Song of the Day:
"Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character."
-Albert Einstein
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Tuesday- Military Strong Man
Standing Press: 125x5; 145x5; 160x7
Log Press: 4x12
Pull Ups: 5x4
w/
Upright Row: 3x10
Face Pulls
w/
Arm Curls
Up and down session today. Standing press felt heavy but the log didn't. Pull ups I went chest to the bar on each rep and they weren't as hard as I thought they were going to be. I haven't done upright rows since college. I'm going to give them a shot and see how I feel with them. I've heard they can be bad for your shoulders. But I'll be the judge of that.
This week I'm going to plan out my peaking cycle. It's going to be 13 weeks or so and will take me through 3 December when my meet is. Other than that I'm just going to keep plugging away.
Song of the Day:
"Small strokes fell great oaks." -Benjamin Franklin
Log Press: 4x12
Pull Ups: 5x4
w/
Upright Row: 3x10
Face Pulls
w/
Arm Curls
Up and down session today. Standing press felt heavy but the log didn't. Pull ups I went chest to the bar on each rep and they weren't as hard as I thought they were going to be. I haven't done upright rows since college. I'm going to give them a shot and see how I feel with them. I've heard they can be bad for your shoulders. But I'll be the judge of that.
This week I'm going to plan out my peaking cycle. It's going to be 13 weeks or so and will take me through 3 December when my meet is. Other than that I'm just going to keep plugging away.
Song of the Day:
"Small strokes fell great oaks." -Benjamin Franklin
Monday, August 16, 2010
The Freakin' Weekend
Another great weekend in the bank. There was some partying, some lifting, some eating, a baby was born, but NO, and I mean no, barnyard animals were harmed. Here we go.
Saturday I lifted with a crew consisting of myself, Katie, Joe Flick, and Matt Cerra. Nic was also in the gym but he got there a bit before us and was almost done. Here comes the awesome.
Deadlift: worked up to 435x5
Sgl. Arm Row: 3x10
w/
Glute Ham Hypers: 3x10 w/ 25#
Ab Roll Outs: 3x10
2 Quarters conditioning
I've been working with Matt and Joe for a bit now. Matt is about 4 months post ACL surgery and Joe plays semi-pro football. Matt has really come a long way. He's been chomping at the bit to get beck into normal lifting instead of the stuff that is going to be best for his knee, which can get a little boring and repetitive. I've just recently started letting him squat and deadlift, albeit light, and he's doing really well.
Joe is in-season right now so he's on more of a maintenance program. Once his season is done he'll likely take a week or two off and then get back at it. Matt and Joe are BFFs and I'm sure there will be some healthy competition between the two. Always a good thing when it's kept in check and doesn't get too out of control.
Saturday night my friends from Carroll, Marcus and Talia Koronkowicz, had a birthday party for Marcus at their home in Illinois. The best part of the night was probably when Eric got a little too much steam going down the stairs and disintegrated a picture frame hanging on the wall. I'll retell it as if I was going to direct it in a Hollywood movie.
Camera is close up on Eric as he approaches the top of the stairs. He's not paying too much attention and probably looking around and talking to others. Camera pulls back and down the stairs as he begins his descent. He quickly picks up steam and realizes he is soon going to be out of control. Cut to Lance slow-motion yelling, "PUUUMMMPPP THHHHEEE BRRRRAAAAAKKKES!" Cut back to Eric who is flailing arms trying to regain equilibrium. Cut to side view at the bottom of the stairs as Eric crashes into the wall and blows up the picture frame. Two minutes of cuts to close ups of people slow-motion crying/yelling. End Scene. Great times.
Sunday Katie and I went to the Wisconsin State Fair. It was everything and more I had hoped it was going to be. Here's a list of foods consumed by Katie and/or me. Cheese Curds, Corn Dog, Krispy Kreme Cheeseburger, Deep Fried PB&J, Deep Fried Pickles, Flavored Milks, Corn on the Cob. I'm sure that I'm forgetting something but it's a start.
The best part of the fair was my serious underestimation of Katie's love of animals. Especially pigs. Every pig we saw she would crouch down, pet its fur, and squeal, "HI WILBUR! YOU'RE CUUUTE!" We also saw a pig get loose of its 12 year-old handler and almost side swipe a woman to the ground. Those things have a lot of inertia and could probably pack one hell of a punch once they get going.
We were also big fans of the rabbits. Something about their soft fur and floppy ears gets me. I do not, however like the albino ones. I'm ok with the white fur, but their blood red eyes creep me out in a big kind of way. No thank you.
I also want to congratulate my friends Brian and Lindy Jachimek who welcomed their first child, Brady, into the world on Sunday. I like to think I'm almost like an uncle now. It's going to be so awesome.
Once again a great weekend with great people doing some pretty awesome things. I wouldn't trade it for anything.
Song of the Day:
“When having a smackerel of something with a friend, don't eat so much that you get stuck in the doorway trying to get out.”
-Winnie the Pooh
Saturday I lifted with a crew consisting of myself, Katie, Joe Flick, and Matt Cerra. Nic was also in the gym but he got there a bit before us and was almost done. Here comes the awesome.
Deadlift: worked up to 435x5
Sgl. Arm Row: 3x10
w/
Glute Ham Hypers: 3x10 w/ 25#
Ab Roll Outs: 3x10
2 Quarters conditioning
I've been working with Matt and Joe for a bit now. Matt is about 4 months post ACL surgery and Joe plays semi-pro football. Matt has really come a long way. He's been chomping at the bit to get beck into normal lifting instead of the stuff that is going to be best for his knee, which can get a little boring and repetitive. I've just recently started letting him squat and deadlift, albeit light, and he's doing really well.
Joe is in-season right now so he's on more of a maintenance program. Once his season is done he'll likely take a week or two off and then get back at it. Matt and Joe are BFFs and I'm sure there will be some healthy competition between the two. Always a good thing when it's kept in check and doesn't get too out of control.
Saturday night my friends from Carroll, Marcus and Talia Koronkowicz, had a birthday party for Marcus at their home in Illinois. The best part of the night was probably when Eric got a little too much steam going down the stairs and disintegrated a picture frame hanging on the wall. I'll retell it as if I was going to direct it in a Hollywood movie.
Camera is close up on Eric as he approaches the top of the stairs. He's not paying too much attention and probably looking around and talking to others. Camera pulls back and down the stairs as he begins his descent. He quickly picks up steam and realizes he is soon going to be out of control. Cut to Lance slow-motion yelling, "PUUUMMMPPP THHHHEEE BRRRRAAAAAKKKES!" Cut back to Eric who is flailing arms trying to regain equilibrium. Cut to side view at the bottom of the stairs as Eric crashes into the wall and blows up the picture frame. Two minutes of cuts to close ups of people slow-motion crying/yelling. End Scene. Great times.
Sunday Katie and I went to the Wisconsin State Fair. It was everything and more I had hoped it was going to be. Here's a list of foods consumed by Katie and/or me. Cheese Curds, Corn Dog, Krispy Kreme Cheeseburger, Deep Fried PB&J, Deep Fried Pickles, Flavored Milks, Corn on the Cob. I'm sure that I'm forgetting something but it's a start.
The best part of the fair was my serious underestimation of Katie's love of animals. Especially pigs. Every pig we saw she would crouch down, pet its fur, and squeal, "HI WILBUR! YOU'RE CUUUTE!" We also saw a pig get loose of its 12 year-old handler and almost side swipe a woman to the ground. Those things have a lot of inertia and could probably pack one hell of a punch once they get going.
We were also big fans of the rabbits. Something about their soft fur and floppy ears gets me. I do not, however like the albino ones. I'm ok with the white fur, but their blood red eyes creep me out in a big kind of way. No thank you.
I also want to congratulate my friends Brian and Lindy Jachimek who welcomed their first child, Brady, into the world on Sunday. I like to think I'm almost like an uncle now. It's going to be so awesome.
Once again a great weekend with great people doing some pretty awesome things. I wouldn't trade it for anything.
Song of the Day:
“When having a smackerel of something with a friend, don't eat so much that you get stuck in the doorway trying to get out.”
-Winnie the Pooh
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