Internet Thievery

Last week I ordered some new shoes from Zappos.com.  I got some Asics Onitsuka Tigers to be exact.  Decent shoe, for the most part flat heel, nothing too fancy.  This morning I was perusing my Twitter timeline and one of the news feeds I follow lets me know that lo and behold Zappos.com customer data was hacked and 24 million accounts had been compromised.  Needless to say I'll be watching my credit card balance like a hawk.

I've touched on this topic before but I'm going to rant again.  I have zero tolerance for thieves.  I'm not even too keen on dressed up foxes stealing from the rich and giving to the poor.

Douche.

The most cowardly form of thievery has to be internet thievery.  To sit behind a computer and steal someone else's credit card numbers and then use those cards to buy stretch pants to fit their 350 lb fat asses at Wal-Mart is an act that needs to be punished.  And I think I know just what that punishment should be.

I'm proposing a very Old World solution to a New World problem.  If you get caught hacking or buying credit card info you should get your hands chopped off.  Simple as that.  I'd like to see some fucking nerd with a neck beard and a Zelda t-shirt try to press ctrl+alt+F5 without any fingers.  No more tappity-tap for the self-proclaimed "world's best hacker".  Nope, you just sentenced yourself to a lifetime of typing with a pencil in your mouth and not being able to shovel Flamin' Hot Cheetos down your throat.

But that will never happen.  We've grown soft as a society when prisoners and criminals live better than half the free population.  Go to jail and live comfortably off the government's endless bank account.  We could save a lot of time and a lot of money and I'm sure some cavalier, young scientist can figure out some way to put all those extra hands to good use.  What do you think?