Troy Dequaine's Guide To Manliness, Vol. 1

In no particular order this list is just a few rules to live by.  If we as men followed these and our heads more and our dicks less the world would be a much better place.  Ladies, some of these rules apply to you as well.  This list is by no means complete.  If you have any rules to add drop them in the comments but keep it as apolitcal as possible.

Knives > Scissors

The bigger the knife the better.  Always.

Making Something > Buying something (food included)

Using your hands and your brain to create feels so much better than swiping a credit card.

Women > Girls

Any man that’s dated a woman knows exactly what I’m talking about.

Reading > TV

Get engaged in what you are doing and learn something.

Pickup Trucks > Family Sedans

Trucks have been the vehicles of men forever.  Don’t turn your back on history.

Family Sedans > Minivans

If you’re thinking about getting a minivan just get a SUV and save yourself the embarrassment.

Whiskey > Beer

Whiskey was handed down to men from gods on high.  Drink accordingly.

Beer > Anything that is colored pink or has an umbrella

If your drink has an umbrella your ass had better be on vacation.

Lifting > Cardio

Picking heavy things up and putting them down is about as primal as it gets.

Cardio > Nothing

Being fat and strong is ok.  Lean and weak is passable, barely.  Being fat and weak is grounds for 

termination.  Train accordingly.

Being alive > Being a zombie (literally and figuratively)

“Life is a garden, dig it.” –Joe Dirt

Sacking Up > Being a little bitch (goes without saying)

Stop complaining.  Do what needs to be done when it needs to be done.

Being Muscular > Being effeminate (see above)

Despite what the media and most women say, women want a man that will protect them and their offspring.  It’s in their genes.

Dogs > Cats

Next person that says, “My cat thinks he’s a dog!” gets unfriended- from life.

Sports ≠ War

You’re playing a game, not going into battle. 

“Beast Mode” does not exist within the confines of the gym or of sport.

Neither does “hardcore”. 

Eating Meat > Being a Vegetarian

Why go against nature, evolution, and the fact that some animals practically jump onto your plate saying, “EAT ME!”?  It doesn’t make sense.

Bullet Points and Lists > Long-ass Dissertations

Case-in-point, this article.

Class > Swag

Having class can help open a lot of doors in life.  Your swag won’t pay your bills in ten years.

Confidence > Cockiness

Absolutely no one likes the loud-mouthed douchebag.  I shouldn’t even have to say it.

Mindful Play > Mindless Work

This goes back to being a zombie.  Every now and then act like a kid and play a sport or climb a tree or play tag with your kids.  The point is, “Those that do not move, do not notice their chains.” –Rosa Luxemburg