Thursday- Bench Deload

Bench: 3x5 @ 185

DB Incline: 3x12

Chest Supported Row: 3x12

Face Pulls: 3x12

Shoulder Complex: 2x10
w/ DB Pummels: 2x15

Truck Push/Pull: 4 trips each

Treadmill: 20 mins

Today was a good session. Nothing too hard, but not too easy. The truck push was hard as I couldn't really build any speed. The pull was easy since there was a slight downward slope. I didn't have a driver either so the truck went a little sideways at times. I think one of the tires is a tad low.

Song of the Day:

“Muddy water, let stand - becomes clear” -Lao Tzu

Tuesday- DL/MP Deload

Not a whole lot to report on today.  I'm deloading this week and I feel pretty good about it.  I'm feeling a little beat up and this week will be good to recharge the batteries.

DL: 220x5, 270x5, 330x5

MP: 75x5, 95x5, 115x5

Accessory Circuit: 3 sets of 15 reps for everything
Barbell Shrugs: 225
GHR: BW
Single Arm Row: 100
Weighted Sit-Ups: 55

Cybex Intervals: 30 minutes
Outside Walking: 15 minutes

Now I want to talk about something I've noticed.  Every time I see a fat guy's ride it is invariably either a huge conversion van or a Lincoln Town Car.  I'm not saying every one that drives either of those automobiles is fat, just that larger gentlemen tend to prefer them over other means of conveyance.  Case in point: I can think of three kid's dads that I train. All three are pretty large men.  What do they drive?  Two of them roll in conversion vans and one drive a Buick LaCrosse - the poor man's Lincoln Town Car.

My guess is that these cars are easy to get in and out of and offer the smoothest ride possible.  Why else would they be the motorcar of choice for those north of 275 pounds?

Another case study.  My Grandpa Bob I wouldn't say was fat, but he was definitely of a robust and rotund nature.  His ride?  You bet your ass he cruised the avenues and alleyways of Green Bay in a Lincoln Town Car.  Shit, even his belt buckle was awesome.  A huge "BOB" letting everyone he crossed paths with know he meant business.

I'm looking forward to the day when I'll be riding in my own Town Car or conversion van with one arm out the window and the other steadily at 12 o'clock.  A sweet beard and some Blueblocker sunglasses and I'm all set.

Song of the Day:

"You've got to do your own growing, no matter how tall your grandfather was.” Irish saying

Weekend Recap

I've gotten a little behind on the ol' blog.  No real reason for it, just busy followed by being lazy.  Friday and Saturday were just cardio days.  I did two sessions each day totaling 70 minutes.  It's either walking on the treadmill or the cybex machine or a combination of the two.  When I'm on the treadmill I've found that playing air guitar to my music really helps the time go by.  On the cybex I do intervals so that usaully keeps my mind occupied.  Otherwise I just stare into the middle distance and feel my mind turn to mush.

Saturday night for about six hours I did not treat my body like the temple that it is.  Eleven PBRs, three hamburger patties, a shitload of watermelon and strawberries, and some lemon cake, had me feeling very full and a little bit guilty.  Sunday morning Lance and I squatted at Lance's place of business, Athletic Republic.  Here's what I did.

Squat: worked up to 475x1

GHR: 3x8

45' Back Extension: 3x10 (This machine we're pretty sure was designed by a woman.  There was a definite lack of satchel space.)

Abs: three sets

Short and sweet.  We were in and out in about an hour fifteen.  Just the way I like it.

Song of the Day:

Country Roads is arguable the best Me First and the Gimme Gimmes song.  They are a punk super-group that only plays covers.  If you want a punk twist on some of your favorite songs I would strongly recommend them.

“Waste no more time arguing about what a good man should be. Be one.” -Marcus Aurelius

Thursday- Bench

Release the Kraken

Bench: worked up to 250x6

Bent Over Row: 8, 6, 6, 6

TRX Dips: 3x6

DB Incline: 3x12

Face Pulls: 3x12

DB Pummels: 2x15 ea. arm

Prowler: You can read what I did here.

After my piss poor showing on Tuesday I wanted to come in and have a good session.  I'm happy with how things went.  Usually the first thing to go when on a diet is the upper body strength.  Mine seems to be holding steady, which is about the best I can hope for.  Monday will be the half-way mark for the diet and I'll be doing an update.

If you've never seen a TRX set-up they are easily adjustable straps with handles that you can hang off just about anything.  They are actually quite versatile and easy to use.  They might remind a lot of people of gymnastics rings.  Doing the dips took me back to my gymnastics days.  My gymnastics days being when I was six and I had to sit at the downtown Green Bay YWCA and watch my sister in her gymnastics class.  I mostly just did homework, ate vending machine cookies, and snuck into the women's bathroom (just to see what it looked like), but there may have been some learning by osmosis going on.

Fight Scene of the Day:

“Honest criticism means nothing: what one wants is unrestrained passion, fire for fire.” -Henry Miller

Tuesday- Deadlift

Energon was pretty low today.  Combination of being on this damn diet and we are crazy busy at work so we are all pulling some long hours.  Getting to sleep has not been a problem lately, just the amount.  Either way I had certain numbers I needed to hit and I did them and not an ounce more.

Deadlift: 400x5, 455x3, 510x1

Reverse Hyper: 3x15

Glute-Ham Hyper: BWx15, +25x12, +45x8

Hanging Leg Raises: 3x15

Cybex: 30 of the most boring minutes of my life

“You are a coward when you even seem to have backed down from a thing you openly set out to do.” -Mark Twain

Sunday and Monday

Went down to Illinois yesterday and trained with Lance at his place of business.  He trains at an Athletic Republic in Libertyville.  Not a bad facility, but not a lot of room for strength training.  Anyways here's what I did.

Standing Press: worked up to 175x3

Chins: 5x5 weighted

Dips: 2x15, 2x10 all BW

Abs: two sets
Minute Runs x3

After training we grilled with our other friend Al and watched the movie Zombieland.  I had a 16 oz sirloin and some sweet potato fries.  Zombieland is pretty damn funny.  Woody Harrelson at his finest.

This morning I did 35 minutes on the incline treadmill.  Tonight I might do some boxing stuff when I get home.  It'll depend on how I'm feeling.  Right now the straw poll is telling me to man up and do what I need to do.

Song of the Day:

“When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be” -Lao Tzu

Saturday

Got two in today.  Walked on the incline treadmill this morning for 35 minutes and did six, three minute rounds of heavy bag work.  It has been a while since I've done any boxing work and I was a little rusty.  I downloaded a round timer that shouts out commands and punching combinations for you.  It's pretty rad, prevents me from slacking, and allows me not to have to think too hard.

Tomorrow I'm going down to Libertyville to train with Lance.  Military presses are in order for me.  Afterwards we will be grilling up some deliciousness.  Red meat and sweet potatoes.  Doesn't get much better than that.

I'll be lounging for the rest of the afternoon and running some errands later.  Feels good to not have much to do.

Song of the Day:

This is off of The Flatliners' newest album, Cavalcade.  I still think their first album is my favorite, but this one is pretty good.  This song is for all the mornings with friends after a wild night out.

"My favorite animal is steak." -Fran Lebowitz

Thursday- Deadlift

I was in an all-business, no-effing-around, stay-out-of-my-way, growly, Mr.-Yuck-face kind of attitude today.  No real reason why, I just wanted to smash some weights and didn't want the usual jokes/joksters getting in my way.

Power Clean: worked up to 282x1 (might be a PR)

DL: worked up to 485x4

RDL: 242x8, 262x8,8

Sgl Arm Row: 80x10, 90x10, 110x20

Conditioning: Hill sprints, hill jogs, tempo runs

I did some of each.

I had Nic check my body fat this morning.  Not what I was hoping for.  Changes need to be made to training and diet.  I think I might be eating too much protein.  Right now I'm at about 300g per day.  I will probably drop this down to around 225-250g per day.  I'm not 100% sure what I'm going to do with my training.  Lifting will stay the same.  Cardio and conditioning needs to get buckled down.  I'm kicking around adding in some heavy bag work and maybe upping the intensity on my morning cardio.  If I up the intensity I'll need to get something in my stomach before hand to avoid muscle catabolism.  I'll figure it out by Monday.

Song of the Day:

If bassists were former U.S. Presidents, Matt Freeman would be Teddy Roosevelt riding an elephant stomping everything in sight.  He kicks that much ass.

“The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.” -Mark Twain

Tuesday- Bench Press

Bench Press: worked up to 235x9

DB Bench Press: 3x10

Bent Over Row: 2x8, 2x6

DB Shrug: 2x15
w DB Pummels: 2x15

Prowler: 140lbs, 40 yards, 5 high handle, 5 low handle

My conditioning is definitely improving.  The prowler wasn't as hard as I thought it was going to be.  I wasn't too strict on my rest times, but I wasn't taking forever and a day either.  My strength is holding steady.  235x9 pretty close to a rep PR for me.

The diet has been going well.  I'm about 211 pounds of twisted steel and sex appeal right now.  By the end of it I think I'll be right around the 200-205 range.  Here is what my diet is for today:
Meal 1: 2 scoops protein, 1 tbsp peanut butter
Meal 2: 6 egg whites, 1 whole egg, 1 apple, 1 orange
Meal 3: 1 cup oats, 2 scoops protein
Meal 4: 1.5 cups broccoli, 2 cans tuna
Meal 5: 4 oz lean ground beef, 6 oz chicken breast
Meal 6: 6 oz sirloin steak, 2 cups raw spinach

Pretty simple, nothing fancy, maybe not always the best tasting- but who's going to argue with the results?

Song of the Day:

“Oh while I live, to be the ruler of life, not a slave, to meet life as a powerful conqueror, and nothing exterior to me will ever take command of me.” -Walt Whitman

Saturday

Squat: 345x3, 395x3, 445x3

Good Morning: 135x10, 185x10x2

Bulgarian Split Squat: 3x6 each leg

Weighted Sit Ups: 3x10

Prowler: 90 lbs, 8 trips

Awesome session today.  Lance came by and we got shit done.  It's what we do.  In the gym, in the bar, at your niece's birthday party, we're there to f*ck sh*t up.  Not really at your niece's birthday party.  We'd only be there for the cake, not to ruin anything.

Here's a video of my last squat set.  Shawn Kemp's shadow was looming over me and I couldn't let him down.  For whatever reason Shawn Kemp was my favorite basketball player when I was a kid.  I think it was because he could absolutely throw down.  Here's a few of the Reign Man's stats from his playing days: 7 illegitimate kids, 4 different moms, 3 different states, 2 drug related arrests.  I got the number of kids and arrests from wikipedia but I made up the moms and states part.  They are probably true though.  But like I said, the man could throw down. 

Song of the Day:

"I have come to kick ass and chew bubblegum.  And I'm all out of bubblegum." -"Rowdy" Roddy Piper

Friday and The Full Moon

Just some morning cardio today.  30 minutes inclined treadmill.  I really hate doing this, but it is what I need to do to win this challenge.

On my way in to the gym this morning I was thinking about a bar that my fellow Carroll students and I frequented while in school.  This place was called The Full Moon.  By sheer coincidence Lance sent me this text this afternoon: Lingerie Night at The Full Moon.  Crazy.  The best way I can describe The Full Moon is that it is Tijuana, Mexico, a trailer park, and international waters all rolled into one.  They used to have this promotion called Lingerie Night.  It was by far one of the most awkward things I've ever been a part of.  It's just random women from some Milwaukee escort service walking around in their underwear.  They would come around and ask if you wanted a "dance" and if you bought one they would just kind of wiggle around in front of you and tell you what they were wearing and where they got it from.  I accidentally bought one and was laughing on the outside, but crying on the inside for this poor woman.  She didn't want to tell me she got her bra at Vicotria's Secret and I honestly didn't give a shit.  For the dance they also gave away raffle tickets.  I didn't win, but what were they raffling?  That's right, hardcore porno and sex toys.  I shit you not.

Lance also hit the nail on the head when he wrote me this: I think the main reason our group of friends behave the way we do in drinking environments is because we cut our teeth at a bar the resembles thunder dome and not some bs college bar.

Back to the everyday operation that was The Full Moon.  Our first taste was St. Patrick's Day my sophomore year.  They gave away free green beer and acted as if they didn't know they had to card people that looked like they might still be in high school.  Anything was ok at The Full Moon.  Wanted to jump on a bunch of your friends off of the stage.  Go for it.  Want to get all liquored up and pass out on the bar.  Just don't puke.  Want to scream "Fuck 'em Bucky!" at the top of your lungs at the regular on the other side of the bar.  Hell we'll scream with you.  That place was the finest Waukesha had to offer and a bunch of dumb, drunk, underage college kids.  What could go wrong?

Well it turns out the police got wise to us.  Soon they started raiding the place for underage kids.  The back door was never locked so all the young'ns could make their escape.  Soon the fines were too much and they had to start carding.  We were all over 21 for the most part by then and we still went, but it seemed to lose some of the appeal.  We wanted the good old days, the all-or-nothing days.  We'll never get them back, but maybe that's for the best.

Now half of the fun of going to The Full Moon were the walks to and from said establishment.  Way too many stories to name here.  But I can tell you there were swims across the Fox River, broken parking arms, hilarious ice slips, overpacked cars, and epic falls in the middle of the street.  I'm positive I'm missing some so please, remind me.

I don't wax nostalgic that often, but when I do, I can't help but think about those days and be thankful for all of the people I shared those memories with.  Truly great people that I wouldn't trade for the world.

Thursday

Various Olympic work

Standing Press: worked to 165x5

Dips: +90 lbs x 20 total

Chins: +90 lbs x 15 total

Shrugs: 3x15
Shouder Complex: 3x10
Curls: some sets x some reps

Burpee Power Clean Tabata

...And this little piggy went, "whah whah whah" all the way home.

Song of the Day:

"Love life, engage in it, give it all you've got. love it with a passion, because life truly does give back, many times over, what you put into it” Maya Angelou

Tuesday- Deadlift

Power Clean: worked up to 270x1

Deadlift: worked up to 455x5

RDL: 3x10
Sgl. Arm Row: 3x10
GH Hyper: 3x12
w/ Cable Ab Crunches: 3x10

Prowler Challenge:
40 yards (20 hi/20 low)
Emptyx2
+50 lbsx2
+100 lbsx2
+150 lbsx2

This absolutely ruined me.  After #3 I wanted to call it a day.  After #5 I was just walking the low handles.  After #7 I had to resort to calling myself a p***y and saying if I didn't finish my parents were going to die.  After #8 I would have gladly let anyone call me a p***y and taken the place of my parents.  But I did finish, so in a way I saved their lives.  Hooray me.

Song of the Day: The best song ever written.

“Oh while I live, to be the ruler of life, not a slave, to meet life as a powerful conqueror, and nothing exterior to me will ever take command of me.” -Walt Whitman

Monday

Today was just a light day of morning cardio.  20 minutes in intervals on the Cybex machine.  Rolled and stretched.

I went to my Grandpa's house yesterday before I drove back to Stallis.  He's been kind of sick lately, but I'm not too worried.  I'm pretty sure he is invincible.  Here is a rundown of some of the stuff he has gone through: sliced his neck open on barbed wire while sledding as a kid; lied about his age to enlist in the army because his brother was taken as a POW; been hit by a car on two separate occasions; laughs at heart attacks; chased down and beat the shit out of some kids who were beating the shit out of some other kid; got the shit beat out of him by some bouncers with black jacks at a bar in Green Bay when he was younger; produced my dad who in turn produced me.  Even after all of this he is still the nicest, kindest, gentlest man I've ever met.

I swear he is half way to being on the show Hoarders.  He doesn't have garbage or dead cats laying around, but the man has a ton of stuff.  Most of it is collectible type stuff, but a lot of it is just clutter.  He loves flea markets and thrift stores.  I remember as a kid him having multiple copies of board games, all with some parts missing.  But instead of making a whole game he would just keep all the partial games.  Same thing with decks of cards.

Anyways, he asks me if I like to read and I say, "Sure Grandpa, I like to read."  He then makes me look through all of his book shelves and take whatever books I wanted.  He probably has some of the most boring books to read on the planet.  A sample of some titles: English Town Homes, 1873-1938 (there was a lot of these); The Book of Buttons; Green Bay, An Historical Look; Roger Ebert's Big Book of the Movies; and so on.

Either way it was great to see him and the rest of my family.  I don't get back quite as much as I'd like to so i try to make the most of it when I can.

Song of the Day:

“Thank God for the iron in the blood of our fathers” -Theodore Roosevelt

Have You Ever Versed The Homos?

Wow did I get wrecked last night.  The Segram's Seven whiskey was going down like water.  I had a thirst and the only way to quench it was with some of the ol' fire water.  I had a great time with some awesome friends and I don't really remember a whole bunch, but who cares.  Driving home this morning Matt threw up in or around my truck on two separate occasions.  Pretty much all bile and he got it into a plastic bag so no clean-up was required.

About the title.  During my senior year of college football the whole team had to do a service project and spend an afternoon with some elementary kids in Waukesha.  Being a captain I had to give a little speech about working hard and whatnot and then answered questions that the kids had.  Most of them were like, "Is playing football hard?"
"How much do you bench?"
"Are you going to play in the NFL?"
Then this one kid who I had seen kind of laughing and giggling with his friends raised his hand. 
"Yeah buddy, what's your question," I ask.
"Have you ever versed the homos?" he says under his breath.

Before I could try to answer through my stifled laughter his teacher said something about speaking up when he talked.  It was too much to wrap my head around at the time.  Let's analyze the epic amounts of failure in that question.  First off, there is no verb.  Versus isn't a verb.  To conjugate it like it is one is an extremely low-rent thing to do.  I don't care how old you are, know what words to conjugate and which ones not to.  Second, who are these homos?  Does he even know what a homo is?  If he does know what a homo is where in his head did he imagine that a bunch of them got together to form a football team?  Third, his teacher must not have heard the question because she scolded him to speak up, not for asking such a crude and slightly derogatory question.  I wish she had heard just so I could've seen her reaction.  Fourth, later in the afternoon the kid got into trouble on the playground and had to go inside for a timeout or something.  I wasn't the least bit surprised.

I was reminded of this story this morning by Matt and proceeded to laugh for about 10 minutes straight.  From now until the day I die if I'm ever feeling blue I will think to myself, "Have you ever versed the homos?"  And I will laugh out loud.

Song of the Day:

The strongest have their moments of fatigue. -Friedrich Nietzsche

Friday

Rolled out and did some morning cardio.  I only did 20 minutes but I was sweating good.  Last night I had to open my bedroom window because my room got too hot.  I was pretty excited about that.  I love sleeping with the window open.  Almost like sleeping outside.

I'm going down to Libertyville, IL tonight to visit some college friends.  It should be a great time.  Saturday I'll be heading up to the old stomping grounds of Green Bay.  Having dinner with my dad Saturday night, brunch with my grandma and mom Sunday, then seeing my sister's new duplex before I make my way home.  A lot of driving, but well worth it.

Song of the Day:

One of the best bands of all-time, period.

“There is no doubt that it is around the family and the home that all the greatest virtues, the most dominating virtues of human society, are created, strengthened and maintained” -Winston Churchill

Thursday- Squat

Squat: worked up to 425x5 YBTC

Good Morning: 3x10

Glute-Ham Hypers: 3x10

Prowler: 90 lbs x 20 yards x 8

Outside Cool Down Walk: Shirt off, nips a-blastin', chest hair blowing in the wind

I brought my stance in on squats today.  I'm going to be squatting like this for a while.  Instead of watching my strength go down on my wide stance squats as I progress on the diet, I am going to start a little lighter and work towards improving on this different stance.

Prowler kicked my sorry ass again.  I did all eight pushes in just under four minutes.  It doesn't sound like much, but it was hard as hell and I was just walking it by the end.

Song of the Day:

“I do not think there is any other quality so essential to success of any kind as the quality of perseverance. It overcomes almost everything, even nature.” -John D. Rockefeller