Today, October 31st is the day commonly referred to as All Hallows Eve aka Halloween aka International Dress Like A Slut Night (I'm not complaining about the last one one bit.)
Halloween is a conglomeration of ancient Celtic practices, Catholic religious ceremonies, and European folk traditions. The ancient Celt's believed that today was a day that the dead could come back to earth and that their priests, the Druids, could make predictions about the coming year. They would light bonfires, wear costumes, and have dozens of eggs ready to throw to ward off these spirits.
Now it is a secular community-based holiday revolving around kid's costumes, Trick-or-Treating, and seeing who can out-whore who. Here's a look back at some of my Halloween costumes from the past couple of years.
Who doesn't like clowns?
I don't even think this is from Halloween, but it's scary as hell.
Terry Bernadino from Reno 911.
Nitro from American Gladiators.
(Yes, those bulges are mine, in the arms and elsewhere.)
Hottest Chippendale's dancer you know.
So there you have it. Halloween in all it's glory. I didn't dress up this year but maybe next year I'll think of something good. I've got some ideas brewing.
Song of the Day:
"On Halloween parents sent their kids out looking like me." -Rodney Dangerfield
Single Arm Snatch: 110x1 each side; 120x1 each side; 130x1 on right; 130x0on left
Front Squat: 315 for two singles
Stone Picks: a bunch
First off, I want to say thank you to my mother, Cindy. She donated the first $10 to my Movember team. To donate you can go here. Thanks mom.
Pretty good day today. It was Lance, Matt, Joe, and I at the gym today. Just some dudes getting strong. Afterwards Lance and I cooked up some steak sandwiches and washed it down with some Moose Tracks ice cream. I'm pretty much the happiest camper you know right now. Here's a video of my set of 120 on the SAS.
Notice the sweet 'stache.
Song of the Day:
“The world is full of willing people; some willing to work, the rest willing to let them.” -Robert Frost
Keg Clean and Press: 165er for two single on each side.
Alright loyal readers. I'm going to lay it on the line. The upper lip line as it were. I'm growing a moustache. This isn't some bold statement I'm making. I'm not trying to repopularize the moustache (even though I probably will.)
How do you improve upon perfection?
No, this is about helping my fellow man. I'm doing this with/for a group of men that do this every November and raise funds for prostate cancer awareness and research. It's called Movember. Men sign up and donate their face and a few bucks to the cause. The moustache has become such a conversation piece that it won't be hard to get a few words in edgewise to support the cause. Here are some facts about prostate cancer:
This is the second most common cancer affecting men after lung cancer
The risk of developing the cancer increases after the age of 50
There are over 2 million men in the U.S. currently living with prostate cancer
The 5-year survival rate is 98% and the 10-year is 84%
About 1 in 2 men will get this cancer
All of this goes back to early detection. Men, that means getting your prostates checked by your doctors. I'm looking at you Craig Robert Dequaine.
You can check out my Mospace page here. I don't have a picture up as I type this but one will be forthcoming. So if you have the testicular fortitude to give up your face for one month join the cause. If you don't have the testicular fortitude (or testicles) then donate a few spare bucks. If you do neither you obviously love cancer, hate men, and hate America. Song of the Day:
“Being kissed by a man who didn't wax his moustache was--like eating an egg without salt." -Rudyard Kipling
Bench felt decent today. Pausing always throws me for a loop the first time I do it. From here on out I'll probable pause all my work sets in preparation for my meet. I like doing bodyweight assistance exercises for my main assistance work on my upper body days. Bodyweight stuff doesn't tear up my shoulders and elbows like some other stuff can. My right shoulder feels like it's always on the verge of being a problem, but as of yet hasn't manifested into anything. Train hard. Train smart. Don't be like Coach McGuirk.
I've been pumped all week. Lance, who I've mentioned many a time, is moving in with me this weekend. He is going to be working at NX Level starting Monday. He's super excited and I am as well. We're basically a Gruesome Twosome the likes of which have rarely been seen. It's going to be like Lethal Weapon. He's Riggs, I'm Murtaugh, Eric is Leo Getz (Joe Pesci). Anytime we get into any kind of shenanigans I'll be there to mumble, "I'm getting too old for this sh-" EXPLOSION! So pumped.
Song of the Day:
“After fifteen minutes nobody looks at a rainbow” -Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Squats felt good today. Depth wasn't an issue. I just need to remember to keep sitting back into the hole. First rep at 475 was nice and fast. Second rep was a grinder. No worries. I only have to do one rep each attempt on December 4. Deadlifting is taking the day off and doing power cleans instead. Nothing too hard. My form is, how do you say, shitty. Oh well. Sue me.
Song of the Day:
“Licence my roving hands, and let them go
Before, behind, between, above, below.” -John Donne (16th-17th century pimp)
"Fuck safety." -Geothe. I'm paraphrasing a bit but that was my attitude going in and will be my attitude going forward. I had a rough outline of what I wanted to do today but nothing written in stone. I spent my morning reading this site and was all kinds of jacked to throw some iron around.
I haven't done single arm snatches or front squats in mad long but they felt pretty damn good. Like real good. The most I've ever done for a single on front squat is 365 so to do three singles at 315 is pretty damn good for me. Now it's time for food, a shower, and some reading and/or football for the rest of the weekend.
Song of the Day:
"Insisting on perfect safety is for people who don't have the balls to live in the real world." -Mark Shafer
Motivation was in short supply today. No real reason for it, just kind of tired. But I soldiered through it. Bench felt good once I got going. Nothing felt too heavy or slow. I really focused on pushing the bar back towards the rack instead of straight up. When it's done thusly gravity actually gives you a little assistance. Whodathunk!?
Song of the Day:
"I'm not a teacher, but an awakener." -Robert Frost
Very good session today. Squats felt deep and were never in doubt. Pause squats got tough at the end, but that's what I want. I didn't release my air on the 555 DL when I should have and it felt like something was trying to explode its way through my chest. In a way something kind of was, a giant air bubble. Not too much else to say.
Since I started my lift with this song it's only fitting that I end this post with it.
Song of the Day:
"In this world, a man must either be anvil or hammer." -Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
I couldn't have asked for a better day to be at Lambeau Field today. Not a cloud in the sky, temperatures in the low to mid sixties, some good food, some cold beers, and my family (for the most part). I don't really want to talk about the game. I'm frustrated at this point with the team. They have talent on offense but can't turn that into points. They are beat to shit and are putting practice squad players on the field but they can't use that as an excuse. Needless to say they lost today. When I was a kid and went to the games I used to fantasize that a bunch of players would get hurt and Mike Holmgren would point into the stands and say, "Troy! We need ya pal. Wadda say?" That's why they lost today. Mike McCarthy couldn't pull the trigger and yell, "Dequaine! Get your ass in there and give me a G-D pass rush!" Yessir coach!
What made it worse was that I was sitting in front of quite possibly the most negative fan in the world. No matter what happened it was always a worse case scenario. Every player when they made a mistake was met with, "So and so, you suck!" I bet this suck has never played a competitive sport in his life. He's probably never had anybody watching and critiquing his every move. Yet he feels he is justified in making bullshit comments about professional athlete. In fact, any one person on the field could probably end his pathetic life if they so choose. This asshole at one point towards the end of the game actually said, "Rodgers make a clutch play for once." Are you F-ing kidding me? People like him make me not even want to go to games. It's pathetic. Guy who was sitting in Section 113 Row 29 Seat 1, either be more positive at games and cheer when something good happens instead of unending derision or get face-cancer-AIDS and die the slowest most painful death possible. Your choice.
There were also a few very weird things to happen to me today. I'll rank them from least to most.
3. My Aunt Patti bit my ear as I was hugging her goodbye. Weird Scale: 3.
2. Some of my step dad Pete's friends were doing the shocker hand symbol while getting their picture taken. My dad asked me what that was. All I had to do was say that I was very uncomfortable telling him what it meant and he figured it out and dropped it. Weird Scale: 7
1. Long story short, my mom heard something weirder than my aunt biting my ear happened to me and asked what that was. I tried to explain #2 above but her and my 75 year-old grandmother were just not getting it. They were also trying to figure out The Shocker. Some of their guesses: peeing on an electric fence and someone shoving their fingers up your butt (so close). Even though they couldn't figure it out they just wouldn't drop it. So here I am in a car with my dad, my mom, and my grandmother trying to circumvent explaining The Shocker to everyone. I almost resorted to explaining it as I would to an inquisitive six-year-old asking about the birds and the bees by using nothing but euphemisms. "Sometimes a man and a women, who love each other very much, will do something called The Shocker. The man will hold Thumbkin and Ring Man together. Then he will put Pointer and Tall Man into the women's "down there" and Pinky will go into her "bummers." Thank whatever is out there I didn't have to do that.
Weird Scale: OFF THE FUCKING CHARTS
All in all it was a good day. Would've been better with a Packer's win, but what can you do?
Song of the Day:
“That's my gift. I let that negativity roll off me like water off a duck's back. If it's not positive, I didn't hear it. If you can overcome that, fights are easy." -George Foreman
Clean and Jerk: worked up to 242 for 3 singles (tweaked the absolute shit out of my neck on the last one.)
Log Press: 3x5 at 163
Single Arm Row: up to 120s x 15
w/
Blue Band Good Mornings: 2x15
TRX Inverted Row: 2x15
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Band Tricep Push Downs: 2x25
Tomorrow is one of my favorite days of the year. This is the day that I get to go to a Packer game with the man, the myth, the legend, THE Craig Dequaine. The man was half the equation in making me so you know he's bad ass. Every year for Christmas his gift is that him and I go to a game of his choosing on me. The first Packer game I ever went to was with him. September 1992, Don "The Majik Man" Majkowski gets his ankle blown the fuck up and who comes in? That's right, Brett "I'll Send You Some Dick Pics" Favre. He throws the game winning touchdown to Kitrick Taylor, this former fat kid says, "Whoo Hoo! Heck yes!" and the rest is history.
Song of the Day:
"One father is more than a hundred schoolmasters." -George Herbert
I was a little disappointed in my squat today. I was told by my spotter that I was a little high on my heavier singles. This isn't a mobility issue, or even a strength issue. I'm just not comfortable and I don't trust myself all the way down. To that end I decided to cut out the reverse band squats and went with pause squats. With the pause squats I took about 60% of my 1RM and made sure I was deeper than parallel and paused at the bottom for about 1-2 seconds on each rep. Hopefully this will make me stronger coming out of the hole and more comfortable getting into it.
Song of the Day:
"There are no shortcuts to any places worth going." -Beverly Sills
What an awesome weekend. I don't think it could have gone much better. Riot Fest 2010 rocked. Thursday Lance, Eric, Dave, and I went to Red Oktoberfest at the Metro. All the bands that played were kick ass and played great sets. Brendan Kelly, the bassist and vocalist of the Lawrence Arms, started with a solo acoustic set. Vultures United, The Brokedowns, The Copyrights, The Cobra Skulls followed with Propagandhi headlining. All of these bands kick ass and I would highly recommend them. Previously to this weekend I was never really into metal or hardcore but Propagandhi has changed that forever.
Friday we went to the show at the Congress theater. The venue was really cool. Spacious, lots of bars, and a trough for a urinal. The acoustics however suck. Despite that it was still a kick ass show. The highlight of the night was by far The Lawrence Arms set. They are definitely one of the top five bands in punk right now. Most of their songs are about living life, taking shit as it comes, and getting messed up with your friends. Very fitting for this weekend.
Saturday was Lance's birthday party. Got to see his parents, Doug and Bonnie, and I drank a butt load of Russian Death Train AKA Riot Punch AKA Black Out Juice AKA Dat Purple Stuff Dat Mess You Up. A lot of people ended up not being able to make it, which is regrettable, but the show went on nicely without them. My favorite part of the night was when Lance was opening his presents from his parents. Mrs. Barilow was watching and being active in it while Mr. Barilow was in the kitchen preparing the snacks and then eating the snacks. Awesome.
This weekend was probably the most fun punk rock weekend I've ever had. I was not however the most punk punk rock weekend. That would be the time Lance, Eric, and I went to a Loved Ones show, walked to Dairy Queen, ate Blizzards, and then went swimming at Lance's house because it was a million degrees that day. So punk.
I managed to make it to the gym today and actually had a really good session. My focus and intensity were on point. I think it was because it was just me and there were no distractions. Anyways here's what I did.
Power Clean and Jerk: 2x3 @ 200
Log Press: worked up to 170x6
Single Arm Row: 120x15
Shrugs: 3x15
w/
TRX Inverted Rows: 3x15
Bam. Awesome weekend comes to a close.
Song of the Day:
"When you pack on mass you sacrifice flexibility, Charlie. That's a fact." -Mac from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
I set the bar on the pins about 3 inches off my chest. This is where I usually fail on a bench press. I then drove the bar up to lockout. Doing this erases any benefit that I would get from the stretch-shortening cycle. I'm going to keep these in for a few weeks and see how my actual bench progresses.
Tonight is the first night of two that Lance, Eric, Dave, and I will be attending Riot Fest. Tonight is Red Oktoberfest with performances by bands on the Red Scare Label. Propagandhi will be headlining. It is going to be fucking awesome. Much Riot Punch will be consumed. I'm going to be going to the local skid row liquor store and picking up four bottles of Night Train and three or so jugs of Purple Drink. Fuck Yes.
Song of the Day:
“It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth." -George F. Burns
45` Back Extension: 3x10
w/
Glute Ham Hypers: 3x10
TRX Fallouts: 3x10
Put some butter and/or jam on me because I was toast after this one. It felt good though. Nothing felt overly heavy. My back did get a little twinge in the lower left side on deadlifts. Nothing to be concerned about, but I stayed conservative and shut it down at 535.
Tomorrow I'm going down to Illinois for the weekend. Thursday and Friday night Lance, Eric, our friend Dave, and I are going to some concerts in the city and Saturday is Lance and Al's birthday bash in Mundelein. Much Riot Punch is going to be consumed. This one may get sloppy.
Song of the Day:
“Let us walk honestly, as in the day; not in rioting and drunkenness, not in chambering and wantonness, not in strife and envying." -The Bible
Oh, Night Train. We've a long history you and I. I was first introduced to Night Train Express back in my sophomore year of college. I believe Lance saw it in the liquor store and bought it because of the Guns 'N' Roses song of the same name. The first few bottles all had dust on them because apparently the shit doesn't fly off the shelves. Night Train Express is produced and bottled by E&J Gallo. They try to disguise this fact by saying that it is produced by Night Train Limited. Why on earth would they not want to proudly proclaim godsend of a drink? I don't know.
Anyways, Night Train is popular among bums, transients, and dumb college kids alike due to it being cheap ($3.69 per bottle) and full of booze (17.5% alcohol per volume). This is a dangerous combo. So dangerous that some community groups in cities along the west coast have tried to get it pulled from the shelves in certain "Alcohol Impact Areas".
"Community groups in Los Angeles, San Francisco, Seattle, and Portland have urged makers of fortified wines such as Wild Irish Rose and E & J Gallo's Thunderbird and Night Train brands to pull their products from the shelves of liquor retailers in skid row areas. In Nashville, Tennessee, one liquor store owner told Nashville Business Journal reporter Julie Hinds that police warned him to stop selling his biggest selling product, Wild Irish Rose, because it encouraged homeless people to linger in the area."
—Janice Jorgensen, Encyclopedia of Consumer Brands: Consumable Products (1993), p. 492.
The problem of bum wines goes back to Prohibition and the Great Depression. Since fortified wines were still easy to procure they became a staple of skid-row drunks. In fact, the term wino came into use during these times to describe people who turned to cheap fortified wines to drown their sorrows.
Poor little guy never stood a chance with a mean wine like that.
According to bumwine.com Ernest and his brothers Julio and Joe wanted to corner the young wine market by selling Night Train and Thunderbird it in the ghettos. They even had radio ads that were very clearly marketed to "those people." "What's the word? / Thunderbird / How's it sold? / Good and cold / What's the jive? / Bird's alive / What's the price? / Thirty twice."They aren't even trying to hide it. They know exactly who they want to get hooked it.
Here is a list of highlights from our Night Train binges in college:
Eric once bonged an entire bottle and proceeded to break his arm later in the night. He had no recollection the next day.
I once drank two bottles and played air drums for three hours at a Motley Crue concert. On the way to the concert I threatened to kill someone who said the N-word.
One time Lance wasn't sure if he was going to drink one night due to a lack of funds. He scrounged the exact change for one bottle of Night Train. Fate my friends.
After drinking a bottle of Night Train John Shelley laid in a bed for four hours that had been peed on by a female acquaintance because he was in no condition to deal with the situation.
During a night of Night Train consumption Lance became extremely emotional for no reason crying, "I'm crying and I'm not even sad!" Edit: That same night Lance tried to push Timmy down a flight of stairs.
Everything that happened last night.
I'm not going to lie, this list is kind of hard to put together due to the fact that I rarely remember much of the previous night when I drink Night Train. A fitting way to end this post is with a quote from Lance that perfectly sums up what Night Train is all about; "That shit'll get in your veins and fuck up your life."
Homecoming weekend 2010. Eric, Lance, and I got to Carroll at about noon on Saturday and wasted no time setting up shop. We had two bottles of vodka, two bottles of Night Train wine, and two gallons of Grape Drink. I started with a vodka grape drink, which is just grape flavored sugar water, or a poor man's Kool-Aid. It didn't take too long for us to come up with the eventual riot punch concoction. Needless to say we were fucked up in no time. Shit, I didn't even make an attempt to go into the game. To give you an example of how messed up we were towards the end of the night Eric just shut down trying to climb a fence. After he got to the other side he tried to climb a small hill. Al describes it like a child first learning to walk. He fell yelling, "Oops! Hit a slick spot!" To get to his feet he basically walked his hands to his feet and pushed his ass in the air. There was also some karaoke I kind of remember. And some other stuff.
It was a great day, I got to see some people I don't see too often, I drank a shitload of booze and I'm in one piece. That's about all I could ask for. Upcoming is going to be an article on Night Train. Better stay off the tracks.
Song of the Day:
"Wine is a turncoat; first a friend and then an enemy." -Henry Felding
